Hmm... Since I'm still waiting for my laptop... And got nothing to do... Then I shall blog.. Something really random...
Sometimes I realise.. I really look up to my sister...
Primary school... Her results was better than mine... Far better than mine.. And I hated her.. They kept comparing me with her.. And the problem was.. They compared my primary one results with her primary 5 results.. And so on... And she pulled me to walk very very fast home everyday after school.. And I was near flying.. She made me clique with her friends.. And I did.. Knew everyone of them and were on good terms with some.. Once she made one of her friends sad and angry and made me comfort her.. She went on to sec school.. Made achievements which I thought was great and envied her.. I finally finished PSLE and had grades much better than hers.. They said nothing of praise.. And I was dissapointed.. But me and her... Were starting to be on good terms.. Which.. I figured.. May be because of age..
Secondary school... I already knew all about her achievements in school.. Chairwoman of C.O for 2 years... Top results for every year.. Top 10 for 'O' lvls.. I looked at her results.. She was too good.. And then I joined C.O... Partly because of her.. Preceeded her post too... But I never got top 10... And I thought.. She was really too smart for me.. She went into poly.. Reason being me.. Theory was she wanted to quickly go out work.. And earn money for family and let me study.. Many people felt that she didn't need to do that for me.. Some people even thought that I'm not worth her doing that.. I did feel guilty.. But that guilty feeling never went to her ears.. She helped at the blasted stall of that man every night while studying.. That time, I wished I didn't have to do that after my 'O' lvls.. But admired her spirit still the same.. She had a malay bf and did some foolish things.. Which made her for a time look really stupid.. But after that she did change a bit... And I finished 'O's and did not get top 10 as predicted.. But was satisfied with my results whatever.. Nvm their comments..
Before polytechnic.. Sis graduated from NYP and went for a job totally unrelated to her diploma.. Quality tester for Maxtor factory.. Time was overnight.. And so the body clock was overturned.. I graduated too.. And went into Maxtor too... After searching and changing into many many jobs.. I worked overnight too.. And everyday.. we were like corpses.. Then sis quit Maxtor soon for a Sales Executive job in Best Denki.. Where she knew her bf.. And then went to sell computers in a company.. And I soon quit for I forgot what reason.. That time.. I thought.. She's really going to do something related to her diploma.. And hope she can get something good.. I went into LJS... And the pay sucks..
Polytechnic.. Started school.. And I continued working against my wishes.. But quit soon and went into cartel with you noe who.. Mainly cos of the pay.. She was thriving at the company.. But pay was still low... But her aim for working has changed.. It was no longer cos of me.. And she started having hate for the family.. Well, ok.. maybe the correct thing is she has been hating the bulk of responsibility for supporting the house.. But still I respected her.. Because she sacrificed her wish for being a neurosurgeon... She sacrificed a lot..
Our lives were no more different... But she had made achievements far better than mine.. And sacrifices far more heartbreaking than mine..
Still.... Our lives is no more different...
...tHiS wAs wrItTeN @ 2:23 PM
SC.. or Kerry?
aka Black
aka Ah Chan
06231987
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